My, oh my. Were it not for Tim and my family this week has been quite fucking rotten. Being dependent on others to make your life good, as if the case for me now, sure has its drawbacks. Without mentioning anything in particular it sure feels as if life is pulling my leg right now. Not funny.
I was just thinking, was this my first week of work after the vacation? But no, it wasn’t. I worked for three weeks before going to Majorca. I was just about to say though that once you work five days a week you start to value your weekend and thus your spare time a whole lot more than when you’re on vacation. It’s insane how quickly these days pass really. Insane.
Made that statement like a thousand times though so nothing new under the sun. Apart from that I’ve had a great weekend. Been having it a bit tough mentally lately. Lots of stuff happening. Lots of thoughts and emotions. Since getting better after last year’s meltdown I’ve mainly breezed through life. It’s been pretty easy. I haven’t really had to try to feel good about myself. And have a good time. It has just happened. Lately that has changed a bit, although not a whole much. But a bit.
The difference now though is that I can see that those are only temporary feelings. And that I don’t have to act on those feelings and let them control me. I can let them be there, and be aware of them, and let them give insight into what’s happening. But I don’t have to let them ruin, for lack of a better word, my day or what not. I also try to turn the situation around. Like for instance if I feel that I’m missing something, I look to what I have instead. And to what all that I have in my life would have been worth, like five years ago.
Only this weekend I’ve hung out with six different groups of people in different occasions. That would have been impossible years ago. I would have been a wreck. Not to mention the fact that I wouldn’t have dared to get to know them. Now I don’t even have to think about that. I only have a good time. It might seem odd to most of you who haven’t faced the same issues but I’m sooooooo happy that it is this way now. So happy that I get to meet all of these peeps and have a good time. It’s not at all something one should take for granted, quite the opposite.
That said, things can always get better and I’m hoping that the future has some good things in store for me 🙂 It’s looking bright!
I don’t know what it is with me and gripping movies. It is a love hate relationship. On one hand I really love them. I love to be moved. I love to feel. I love to laugh. And cry. It makes you feel alive. On the other hand it also gets you in touch with your feelings and your innermost longings. It can be quite painful at times, since those things are stuff that you push aside from your everyday life and that you only get reminded of from time to time when they pop up like Jack in the box. In the end though it is a pleasant feeling and you do want those moments. They are very dear to me and I never regret it.
Just now I watched this very touching and heart warming movie called Brooklyn. It starred an actress that I really like and that I think is quite underrated. She is so talented and so pretty. She does her roles with such calm and elegance. Especially in this movie. I would very much like to recommend it. It is somewhat of a coming of age movie and also about issues that we all might come to deal with. Perhaps that is why you feel so much what of what Eilis (the main character) goes through emotionally.
Not much to add apart from that I should pick up watching the Star Wars movies because it’s barely one and a half week left until the new one premieres. And I’ve yet to watch 4-6. But for today I’m gonna play games and watch the latest episode of iZombie.
Today we ran Runkeepers global 5K challenge and my beard game is quite strong.
I’m growing more and more fond of the idea of working 80% and having Fridays off. Really. That would suit me just perfect. I just have to sell it to myself economically. Why you ask? Well… now I’m here on a Sunday evening again and I find that I haven’t done nearly the things I want to do. Namely I wanted to sit down and play games this weekend but as usual the time has not been there to accomplish that.
Friends, family, work (on a weekend, I know, shoot me) and other stuff has taken up that time and while I don’t dislike any of it (maybe work then) once I sit down on the couch to do those things I plan on doing I really like them. If only tomorrow would have been a free day as well. That extra day. Oh well, at least the week days pass by quickly so there will soon be another weekend. And next weekend, I promise I won’t have anything planned for that. It’ll be you and me, my favorite console!
So this weekend we celebrated sis with family. Went to one of our local favorite places and had some fine food. I was super tired after a tough week at work (my second full-time week) but eventually some calm seeped into me and I was able to relax and enjoy the evening. The day after that I helped a friend out with some work I had promised to do. Took lots of time and energy but hopefully I made him happy in the end. As for me, I swear I won’t be doing much side work in the future. It just eats up too much energy to be worth it honestly. In the evening we played some NHL 16 which is proper fun! Today I’ve been out running with Aigul who’s one of my new friends and also a colleague. I really like her and her family. Her daughter is just too cute and it feels nice to have gotten to know all three of them.
Oh and yeah. I had a hard drive failure in one of my computers. Fortunately it’s in a RAID 5 configuration, meaning that one disk can fail without any of the data on it being lost. Feels good to know that the mail alert system works, notifying me about the issue. So I’ve had to move my blog and a number of other sites. Hopefully it should all be working again. Now I’ve ordered a new drive that I’ll replace the failed one with. And since I have awesome friends who streams media from me I already have had the new drive funded. Thanks guys! Earlier this week we also had a malfunction at work when our mail server completely broke down. Both the drive as well as the hardware. What are the odds!? Hopefully no more hardware failures this year.
Apart from that not much. Life feels good though which is nice. I feel happy and not really stressed in any sense. I really hope that it continues like this for the rest of the year. Really, really do. Also, on a completely different note, check out Quantic Dream’s new game that I’ll be posting a video to at the end of this post.